New Year, New Storytellers

A Review of the "Resolution" Story Slam at Doyle's Cafe in JP.
By Cheryl Hamilton

Mary Hannon

If you don’t have a new year’s resolution yet, don’t worry. At the first massmouth.com Story Slam of 2012, feature storyteller Mary Hannon revealed to guests how the government can help. That’s right. Sometime between extending tax cuts for the rich and rescuing Iranians from pirates, the feds uploaded a webpage devoted entirely to the most popular New Year’s resolutions. The resolutions list begins with ‘drink less alcohol’ and ends with ‘volunteer to help others,’ which when combined sounds like a public service announcement for designated drivers.

Hal Miller Jacobs

Reviewing the federal list on my iPhone Sunday night, I reflect on why I love storytelling. When done well, my favorite stories are the antithesis of the popular variety. They are unique, quirky, and unusual. Good storytellers surprise you like when Mary Faith described her resolution to learn to make wine at the age of 12 after reading a Ray Bradbury novel or when second place winner Hal Miller Jacobs resolved to never fly again after a security official at Logan airport wanted to touch his “stuff” (okay, it was only his luggage on the conveyer belt, but like the audience at Doyle’s, Hal didn’t understand until the very last minute and panicked). Although host Robin Maxfield introduced Hal as an experience teller, the spirited resident from Lexington reminded the audience this was only his second year up front. With his arms raised high above him for most of the story as if still under investigation, Hal’s smartly placed comedic breaks suggest that, even if not under the bright lights, this sophomore has been telling stories for year.

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Robin Maxfield, Host

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David Corbeau

Approaching the microphone, other storytellers also avoided topics like weight loss, debt, or smoking in favor of more unique directions. Beginning with a delightful self-deprecating sequence, David Corbeau declared 2012 the year of “rejection and repression” until an English muffin changed his mood that morning. Deciding spontaneously to give “the good half” of his muffin to his girlfriend (aka, the side that doesn’t fall apart in “burnt carb crumbles” upon toasting), David found renewed joy in simple gestures and wished the audience similar acts of kindness. Meanwhile Dale Averill just wishes he could figure out what exactly happened on New Year’s Eve after he left a different storytelling event and eventually wound up in the hospital. Was it a heart attack or a religious experience? He is resolved to find out.

Antonia L.

While the government lists responsible actions like saving money, storytellers on Sunday embraced more daring resolutions. Chuck Collins delivered an entertaining story about the challenges of switching from soccer to modern dance as a high school student while Antonia L. described a marathon date with a handsome South African that ended with a campaign to save a seal’s life. Trapped in the netting used to catch Tuna, the seal and self-proclaimed vegan had what Antonia described as the “scariest face-off” of her life. In her words, “Did you know that up close seals look like lions, but wet?” Eventually, the couple managed to release the mammal with a simple pair of scissors without the help of a reluctant aquarium staff only a few blocks away.

Abhishek Shah

Unfortunately, Abhishek Shah’s courageous resolution ended on a more somber tone. At seventeen, he resolved to fearlessly ride outside of trains in his native Mumbai, India rather then remain cramped among the commuters inside. Although initially exhilarating, Abhishek now regrets his decision following a tragic encounter between his friend who had taught him how to ride on the outside of trains and an electric pole. “Now I tell people to never ride on the outside of trains,” Abhishek shared, “because nothing compares to life.”

Michael Anderson

First place winner Michael Anderson from Somerville challenged the federal list’s most popular resolution related to food. In an enthusiastic account, Michael shared how all he wanted for his tenth birthday was four bowls of cocoa puffs and hours of roadrunner cartoons. Unfortunately, his mother had recently resolved to improve her family’s diet. In something of a breakfast nook showdown, their wills were tested over a bowl of granola. And as Michael explains, “not the honey dipped, nature valley kind, but angry fundamentalist granola.” In the end, the mother crumbled like the bad half of David’s English muffin and Michael reminded us “that some peoples’ resolutions are stronger than others.”

Karen Given

In the end, the most popular resolution of the night did not involve loosing weight or traveling more often. Instead, the wisdom came from Waltham resident Karen Given who won the audience award with her declaration to stop giving her phone number to men at bars. What was the catalyst? Slimy “Paul with a P” – a man whose memory is so poor that dear Karen had to remind him that it was not she he had cuddled and caressed at the bar in Central Square, but a blond across the room despite the repeated phone calls, text messages and invitations to the big Apple.

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Anuranjan Roy

Perhaps the most memorable moment of the slam came near the end when novice Anuranjan Roy’s name was pulled as teller number nine. New to the massmouth.com community, Anuranjan shared how he decided to make performing at a story slam his 2012 resolution – a feat he achieved in less than nine calendar days into the new year. Unlike other tellers who shared past resolutions, Anuranjan’s story unfolded in real time as he recounted the anxiety-laden week that led up to his first live performance. Growing increasingly nervous as he practiced at home, Anuranjan considered abandoning his resolution several times, but he sealed his fate after sharing the goal with his mom in India over Skype. “I knew I had done it then,” he joked.

So, with a supportive audience behind him, Anuranjan made it to the five-minute mark and applause and cheers erupted. In short, while feature Mary Hannon continues to wrestles over whether resolutions should really just be intentions (aka things she will try but not necessary accomplish) Anuranjan proclaimed to audience that “now, I am free for the rest of the year,” before returning to his table and exhaling fully for the first time in a week.

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Karen Given, Audience Choice; Michael Anderson, 1st Place; Hal Miller Jacobs, 2nd Place

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Cheryl Hamilton is a new transplant to Massachusetts and guest blogger for massmouth.com. When she is not focusing on refugee affairs at work , Cheryl can be found most often dancing, cycling or performing in her one-woman play Checkered Floors.